Making an effort in 2008.

And once again, I have taken a 3 month break from writing. I'm so bad about writing consistently on this thing. Well, a LOT has happened since I last wrote. For one, I'm in a relationship now. The Derek guy that I had just hung out with in the last entry is now my boyfriend. So weird to say, its the first serious relationship I have had in over 2 years. To be honest, sometimes I miss being single. Not because I want to date another guy or anything, its just weird to have to fit your plans around someone else. I adore Derek, he is so funny and we have a great time together, but I already have serious trust issues with him. Had I written more often I could tell you all about it, but it would take me so long to write about it at this point, so I'll skip the details and just say he has jumped on the lie train a few times. But as nice as I am I give him the benefit of a doubt and try to fix it. He pissed on my leg last weekend. Literally, he was drunk and woke up thinking he was in the bathroom, in my attempt to stop him from urinating, he when on my leg. I would like to think I am an exceptional girlfriend. I go out of my way a lot for someone I like, including ditching family and friends. Which in my past I have learned is not a good thing to do and I regret it greatly, but I still do it. We have already had issues like him telling me I can't talk to certain friends anymore, which leads me to believe in his opinion he can't just be friends with a girl. In that case, I'm a little suspicious of a few of his relationships with female friends. I am also very forgiving when it comes to things and I do not get pissed easily. Even when I am upset, I am very calm about it, yelling will get you know where. I like Derek a lot, hell, I love the guy, but I feel like I go out of my way and put in way more effort than he does which sucks. I feel like one day I am going to make a really good wife and mother. But I feel like I may never have the opportunity to do so. As I have aged I have tried to stand my ground a little more and not be such a push over. I honestly think I will never find someone who is going to give me all that I deserve in return. The sad part is, I am completely content with that. Who needs kids of their own? For one I have the most adorable nieces and nephews whom I love very, very much and they love their "Nana" so much in return. I have always heard that you love your kids more than anything, but that is so hard for me to imagine since I love these children so much. Secondly, I am so independent that I do not need anyone to take care of me. Its sad to imagine myself 50 and still single, but I think with relationships comes so much sadness and let downs that in the end, being lonely is worth it. Maybe some luck will come in 08.

There's no place like home

Well, this past weekend I went back to my hometown of Diana, TX. There really is nothing like being home. I love seeing familiar faces and talking to people I haven't seen in forever.

This was probably one of the best weekends I've had back home in a while. Its crazy because even to this day a lot of people think I'm still in NYC, but then I have to explain it was only an internship.

What brought me home was the Yamboree. The Yamboree is a festival for Sweet Potatoes. Yes, a sweet potato...a yam. They have a parade (aka ugly floats being pulled by ford trucks), a carnival (aka 6 rides that you fear might break because the carnies are too drunk to run them), and turkey legs and funnel cakes (disgusting and delicious all at once!)

When I got in town I spent a little bit of time with my mom and then went over to my friend Byrd's house. Everyone was drinking and playing washers. On Friday morning I took my two oldest nieces to the Yamboree (which was disappointing this year.) But I did see a sign on a children's ride that said "While on the ride: No Smoking, No Food or Drinks, and No Bare Feet." YOU KNOW its a problem if they are posting signs about it, I'm just saying. I had a carnie call me fat and said I was "too big" to ride on a carousel. At least I have all my teeth! And if he weren't on meth he'd probably be fat too! Stupid carnies!!

Friday night I met up with my new friend Derek and we rode 4 wheelers. We had an great time. I was even brave enough to let him ride up the steep hill, not once, but twice!! I went home took a shower and came back to pick him up and then we went to McCann. I saw SOO many people I hadn't seen in forever. And to be honest, that is one of my favorite things about coming home. I love hearing everyone yell "Sipes!!" and run up to me and give me a hug. It makes me feel special. I gotta give Derek props for being such a good sport, I felt like I didn't really get to hang out with him because people kept coming up to me. Finally we sat at a table and talked with another friend. Then once again off to Byrd's for some beer. After hours of hanging out, we finally left somewhere around 4am.

Saturday I went shopping with my sister-in-law for the kids' halloween costumes. That night I went to dinner with Derek. We had the most amazing sushi, saki, and conversation. Afterwards we headed to the Country Club for a birthday party. While there I kicked a little ace in washers, had a few drinks, and a few shots of Jack Daniels...which if you remember, isn't exactly my BFF. So I was ready to pass out stat! We went back to Byrd's house and I went to bed as soon as I got there. The next morning I was up and at 'em! I went and visited with my friend Julia for a while and then went and had dinner with Madre and my brother's family. Then it was back to Austin for a fun filled week of work. BLAH! I got home around 1:30am, but it was well worth it.

Yeah, being from a small town sucks sometimes, but there is no place like home. Especially when they have signs that tell you that you must wear shoes. And we wonder why Britney Spears is never at the Yamboree.

Cell phones are expensive....

So last night I went to a concert. Had fun, that was until drank too much, ate a lot of beans and coleslaw, and threw up. For anyone who knows me well, I mixed the beans and coleslaw together. Yeah, I know. Anyway, I managed to spill beer all over my phone so I am out of contact with the world it seems. I got a new phone through AT&T for $300. Yeah, they blow. I think from now on I'm gonna carry my phone in a fanny pack.

People Watching...

I love people watching. It's one of my favorite things to do. My favorite type of people watching is the he/she looks like fill in the celebrity. For example, "hey...see that guy right there, does he look like the best friend of the guy that held his nose a lot in Dazed and Confused. Yeah! Carl! That was his name!"

Last night while at the Charlie Robison concert we saw "Carl" from Dazed and Confused, "Christian Troy" from Nip/Tuck and, a mean old guy that looked like an overweight Ed Harris.

I also like to watch people just to see what they are like. There was this one guy and he was just the happiest thing in the world to be at that concert, he was singing and knew every word and was smiling and laughing. And there was also a group of WT, which I'm sure they are related to me somehow on my Dad's side of the family. haha But they were fun to watch because they were an enviroment unlike their own. Going to concerts is a great place to people watch because there are all breeds of people. So, if you are in a people watching mood, I suggest you head to a concert near you.

How Rude!

Stephanie from "Full House" said it best. "How Rude!"

Seriously, why the hell are people so rude? One incident today has got me fired up. Why be rude, especially when someone is trying to be nice to you.

This reminds me of another time I saw people being rude. It was while I was in New York City. There was this blind man trying to order food and find a seat in a crowded ass Burger King. It was totally obvious he was blind. NO ONE would help him and people were really rude to him when he accidently bumped into them. HE IS FUCKING BLIND! Don't you people have a heart. I was walking by the Burger King when I saw this. I felt so bad for this guy that I walked into the fast food chain and helped him find a seat. I also proceeded to open up his ketchup packages and make sure he had everything he need for his meal. Never in my life had I met anyone as grateful as that man.

My point is it takes 5 seconds and almost no effort to be nice. I think it takes more effort to be rude. Brighten someone's day, be nice, do one nice thing. And one more thing, don't be an a-hole on purpose, it will come back to haunt you.

Morticia Adams

Is there anything wrong with knowing what you would want done in the event that you pass away? I don't think so. I think its realistic. EVERYONE is going to die at some point. So why not make it easier on your friends and family and let them know what you want done in the event that you should pass on. One of my co-workers says I'm too young to have this kind of stuff planned out. Well, you never know when you last day is, so why not be prepared. Its not like I dwell on death. I'd rather not think about it, but it is a part of life. Trust me, I want to live as long as I can. I want to see my nieces and nephew grow up, graduate college, get married, and start families of their own.

On a less depressing note, my friend and I found a jewel of a bar last night. Its called Giddy Up. Its the trashiest little dive bar I've ever been to and we loved every minute of it. Everyone there has been going there the last 30 years of their life. Sunday nights are karaokee night. I sang a ton of songs from Country Legends such as Johnny Cash, Waylon Jennings etc. It was a great time. I think I might become a Sunday night regular. Except I won't go back to my trailer and bitch at my alcoholic husband when I get there. So 2 thumbs up for Giddy Up.

No More Mr. Nice Guy.

Okay, enough is enough. I have decided that after this weekend I am going to stop being the nice person. I am going to stop letting people run over me. I am going to do what I want to do.

I had friends come in this weekend which I was excited about. That was until I felt like my house was just their hotel. I finally stood up to my friend and told her actions were not appreciated. There is so much more to the story that I just can't get in to.

Today I wrote an e-mail to a guy I once bought an airline ticket for. He called the night before his flight left and decided he wasn't coming anymore. Even though I was very pissed, I let it go. But I decided today that what he did was wrong. So, I wrote him an e-mail asking for my $300 back.

If I don't start sticking up for myself, no one will. Frankly, I'm tired of being run over, so I need to keep it from happening and stop sitting in the streets.

Sad to say, but no more mister nice guy.